It's been a while since I wrote a heartfelt post on the blog, but tonight seems like one of the times when I feel like I have to do it.
You see, no matter how many happy pictures I post on the blog or social media, how I seem to have it all together, how my kids appear to be good and decent all the time, the truth is my life is just like any of you. I deal with incessant tantrums and whining, I break up fights every day, I struggle to keep up with homecooked meals, I do takeaways when I am lazy, I don't have enough time to teach mys kid homework or craft with them, I wish I can sleep in every morning but I can't, I use social media as an escape at times, I appreciate a good shower, I lose my cool now and then, I wonder why I lost my cool after that, I tell myself to do better and be a better mum, only to fail myself again the next day. This motherhood journey is a relentless learning journey that never fails to throw me curve balls and reminds me that it is unquestionably the hardest thing I've ever done in my life.
Perhaps it's PMS. Perhaps it's this solo parenting gig that's wearing me out. Perhaps it's just me, someone who needs to have an emotional release every now and then.
Tonight, I cried in front of the kids.
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